On becoming the Wounded Healer
I'm finally believing in myself, that I am becoming 80.
I don’t think I will ever become a licensed therapist. They’ve been helpful in my journey, but the profession itself has limits. I will always recommend that everyone starts under the care of professional supervision.
More and more, I’m drawn to the archetype of the Wounded Healer, one that went into the cave and emerged healed.
The journey never ends, but the wound can be healed. One objection that comes up often is when does this end.
It doesn’t.
But it is worth doing the work to at least heal the gaping wound on your chest.
You healed yourself, so now you can help me
A friend recently told me this after we finished a call. I’m guiding her through the system, helping her find a therapist, seek out the specialized services, and work through the path ahead.
When I took this path, I did it on my own. My therapist helped, but in hindsight, he wasn’t equipped to help me fully. We fumbled and we stumbled along the way.
Maybe that was always the path.
And for anyone else, I wish they had a friend along the way. I’m always watching my ego, making sure that I’m not making a 8-step plan, or a proprietary trademarked certification path.
I think all I really wanted was a friend, to be there with me, not to do the work for me, but to just be there.
And maybe sometimes we need nudge.
Why is it so hard to open up?
In hindsight, getting past my first layer was impossibly hard. It’s the shell, the armor, the mask that I wear to keep me protected from the uncomfortable feelings. It keeps me set in society. I gets me through life.
But the crack opens up.
And we get a glimpse of what’s underneath.
Then we try to path up the crack.
And it breaks open again.
Crack.
For most of my life, I lived without fail. I was “perfect,” until I wasn't. That then opens up the door, for a peek into what lies beneath.
I’m currently working with a friend, who became interested in the work I’m doing. We’re a couple calls into our time together, and immediately, I can see what’s behind the crack.
What I’m good at is seeing it, holding space for it.
My therapist wanted to intellectualize my wound, put a framework around it, and try to understand it.
We don’t need to analyze it.
We don’t need to understand it.
We just need to be with it.
Listen to it.
Hear what emerges.
Feel what the body is saying.
The journey with her begins.
I’m back
These past few weeks have been a little rough, with family life, and now the emerging war. These images are triggering some old wounds. The impacts of war goes deep, beyond the headlines.
Let’s pray.
Let’s project out some healing vibes.
Let’s heal ourselves.
I am 80.
